 |
| Obertraun, Austria // Hallstätter See |
Heyyyy, Molly here. It's been a while, I know. I think I've honestly just been pretty unhappy for a while now, and haven't wanted to bore you with the details. And then a few months ago, someone asked me how I was doing and (totally surprising myself) I answered, "pretty fucking shitty." There it was, plain and simple, no made up hoopla about how amazing things were going for me. I told the truth. And in that moment, I decided to stop being so complacent with the status of my life.
So here we are, May 16, 2017, and I'm sitting on my friend's couch in Prague, having recently quit my job and flown overseas, feeling beyond excited to go home and start a new chapter. Feeling suddenly thankful for everything in my life; for the journey. Thankful for my (almost) 2 year old nephew, who despite his tantrums, constantly brings a smile to my face. For my family, who supports literally everything I do (not sure how I've gotten so lucky). For my circle of friends who span continents and cheer me on... and have been known to make me pee my pants laughing. For sunshine and mountains and croblihas (croissant-donuts). For weird jumpsuits we had to wear to tour salt mines and strangers who smiled at us on the street. For kittens and old dogs and bird whistles. For late night bowling alleys in Austria that serve killer pizza and mini-market Rosé. For fucking everything.
I don't think that this is all because of my new job, but more so because of my new outlook. I'M in the driver's seat. I'M steering the car. I'M choosing my own happiness.
Me, with the shit eating grin. So hey, if you see me smiling, most likely you should join in. Because I'm choosing not to waste my time with things that aren't worth every god damn second of it. So, let's do this together.
Now, it wouldn't be the blog of an overly detail-oriented, perfectionist, kinda lunatic, without a list! So here we go:
3 Month Goals
(Hey, I gotta start small ok?)
- Learn the names of everyone I work with, staff and members. Learn a little tidbit about each and every one of them, because if Locals taught me one thing, it's that people feel so warm when they're remembered; when they're known.
- Make a point to do at least one thing every week that's outside of the usual daily grind. Be it an outdoor concert, a road trip, a beach day, or a drag show. Something that wakes me up & helps me see myself/my friends/my community/the world.
- Stop critiquing my body and start appreciating it for what it is. Since going to the gym a lot more over the past year, I've seen muscles I've never seen before, and definition that was never there. Yet I continually focus on the soft spots. Time to stop and embrace who I am. I'm strong, resilient, scarred/bruised(/really pale), and also, beautiful. Rail thin isn't who I am, who I'll ever be, and who I need to stop pretending I want to be.
- Find a pupper. Be it a friend's dog I can take temporary custody of, a volunteer gig at a shelter, or better yet, one of my own. I've been wanting a canine companion for SO.MANY.YEARS. Time to make it happen. I'm ready.
- Go on more than 2 dates with somebody before deciding that I don't want to be with them. No ones perfect, including me, and that isn't a conclusion that should end things for either side. I need to not only give other people a chance, but myself a chance too.
- Find a language class or program to join into. I've been dying to continue my Spanish practice, and have always been enamored with learning some conversational German. What am I waiting for? Ahora es el tiempo, aquí es el lugar. Das kannst du deiner Oma erzählen.
- Order dessert more often. It's always so good, and I rarely leave room for it. It's important to save space for life's sweet little endings.
- Pick up the camera more. Take more photographs. Capture more of how beautiful life is. I never want to take away from a moment, but sacrificing a second of it in order to reminisce on it for hours: totally totally worth it.
- Forgive everyone who's ever been a piece of sh*t. To me, or anyone else I care about. Holding grudges takes a lot of energy, and ***SHOCKER ALERT*** doesn't change anything about the person who hurt you.
- Spend more time in the sun. It cures so much more than we allow ourselves to believe. It cleanses, refreshes, and fills you back up.
Here goes nothing!
 |
| Hallstätt, Austria // UNESCO World Heritage View |
