Quinoa Love

 Warm Quinoa, Brussel Sprout, Mushroom, 

& Goat Cheese Salad

I figure I've pained you with enough of my late night rambling posts, and should reward you with some food porn. Of a delicious quinoa salad I made this past weekend. Yum.

So upon realizing I had the day off, was hungry, and hadn't eaten anything "pretty" in days (weeks), I decided to pack up and head to Barrington to hang with the rents. I so so so enjoy my time up there and my time with them, so it was the perfect opportunity to unwind and do some mindless cooking. I felt like I needed a little bit of health in my system and so I opted for a quinoa salad with veggies, my all time favorite cheese: goat, and a simple dressing. My original intention was to have my veggies of choice be asparagus and mushroom, but I panicked at the grocery store and grabbed Brussel sprouts instead. Fantastic mix up. So here goes nothing. 

Ingredients:

About 3 cups Brussels, chopped

1 or 2 cups mushroom medley

Kalamata olives, chopped up

Garlic

Some onion

1 cup quinoa

4oz goat cheese

Salt, pepper, olive oil, balsamic, lemon, chives

Directions:

1. Roast all of the veggies

2. Cook up that quinoa

3. Mix everything together with some cheese, oil & vinegar, salt & pepper, and a squeeze of lemon

4.Sprinkle with some fresh chives

5. EAT, preferably over some greens with some protein (see below)

Super easy, delicious, and just what I needed. ¡Que aproveche!

How to Make Coffee

Step 1: Realize how unbelievably exhausted you are.
Step 2: Boil water.
Step 3: Contemplate what tasks you should try to accomplish with your few hours of freedom. Decide to do none of them.
Step 4: Add ground coffee and hot water to french press.
Step 5: Go to the bathroom. Bring your cell phone with you and accidentally spend 10 minutes scrolling through Instagram.
Step 6: Press coffee. Also, realize that you made enough for three people even though you're solo.
Step 7: Drink 1 cup coffee while scalding hot. Look at tongue in mirror to make sure it hasn't fallen off.
Step 8: Chug the next two cups of coffee, lukewarm, so as not to be wasteful. While chugging, change clothes 10 times before finding the outfit you hate the least.
Step 9: Stumble into your day still exhausted but awkwardly over caffeinated.
Step 10: Make everyone around you uncomfortable with eye contact that lasts a little too long.

Prius Etiquette 101

1. Pull into gas stations and clean your windshield, but don't fill up. Because 50+ miles to the gallon. Whaaaduuuuppp.
2. Have a playlist of hip-hop/rap at the ready for red lights on hot days.  Who's bumping Tupac? Oh its me. In the gray Prius. With the baby seat in the back. Hello.
3. Pass sports cars whenever possible, solely so you can watch their sense of masculinity diminish.
4. Drive real slow through downtown strips, and whistle at all the cuties. Wait for the look of disappointment when they see you in a hybrid. Photograph reactions if possible.
5. Scare the shit out of people in parking lots as you cruise by at zero decibels.  Silent. But. Deadly (not really, but lets pretend together).
6. Drive 100 miles roundtrip on $5 or less. This is actually something to be jealous of. Seriously.
7. Finally, sleep soundly knowing that you aren't putting the same carbon footprint into the world that you used to in your Toyota 4Runner. Even though your current car is significantly less badass.  People have made bigger downgrades. In regards to cars and significant other.

And goodnight.

Late Night Nonsense

So I said I would post everyday until August, and technically its already Sunday, but it still feels like Saturday because I just got home from work. Sooooo, I'm tired, smell like blue cheese dressing and spilt beer, and am watching Always Sunny in order to fall asleep. Apologies in advance.

First Up: My new dating mantra... The D.E.N.N.I.S. System. Flawless. Fucking flawless! Except for maybe instead of separate entirely at the end I should have "Suck in forever." You just got Molly-zoned! Boom!

And second up: Beach/Concert/Public Drinking prep... Lotion bottle alcohol! Why have I ever looked anywhere other than Always Sunny for life advice?!

So, I'd like to promise that tomorrow's post will be better, but I work open-close so you're probably going to get something similarly disappointing. Buena suerte to us all!

Goonight

The New Stalker Forum: LinkedIn

So I have a bad habit of google searching guys that I'm interested in. I like to figure out their back story so I know what I'm up against. Crazy (but usually gorgeous) ex-girlfriend, found her, likely stalked her too to be honest. Impressive employment history, jealous of it. Live with your parents, not a secret anymore (also, jealous of it). Weird and uncomfortable habits (i.e. World of Warcraft addict, into sending FarmVille invites, super love Trump- or worse yet Ben Carson) are no longer private anymore.  One of the toughest parts of these internet escapades is pretending that I didn't take part in them.  I have to act surprised when a guy tells me that he spent a year working in a school in Colombia, or when he confesses that he only recently got out of a relationship (c'mon, you think I didn't know that already?!). I have to feign excitement when they tell me that, they too, are fans of traveling and drinking dark beers.
Enter adulthood: the land of careers and networking. And LinkedIn! God damn LinkedIn.  So quick and easy to see what a guy is about! Or any person for that matter! I search their name, view their profile, and BOOM, employment interests, history, and so much more are at my fingertips. It's like a mecca for seeing the adult side of someone. Combined with facebook, instagram, the news clip from their high school basketball team winning the championship, and that website they created for their college tech class, I've got the full picture.

Well, I recently discovered that some people get FUCKING NOTIFICATIONS WHEN YOU VIEW THEIR PROFILE. Oh my god. What the actual fuck! Not only does this challenge the possibility for future creeping, but it means that so many people must know by now what a complete creep I am! Like, I assume other people creep too, but I've gotten frighteningly good at it. Well, no, actually, clearly I haven't gotten good because I'm only just recently realizing this startling info. Uuuuugh.
I guess that the moral high-road take away from this would be to get to know people in person instead of taking tabs on the online, but instead I'm just gonna sneak this link in here: http://www.socialtalent.co/blog/how-to-stalk-people-on-linkedin-in-private. You're welcome.
Also, if any of you people who possibly stumble across this blog know of any other creeping outlets, please let me know.
And if any of my male interests stumble upon this page, I'm honestly sorry.  The internet has been my enemy for the past few years, including self-diagnosing, creeping, over analyzing, and researching instead of doing. I swear I'm not really that much of a creep, just trying to find your arrest logs before I become a subset name on one of them (aaaaaaand I also want to know the name of the band you joined in 9th grade).